76 Days To Go

Apologies for the lack of updates. Can't really give you a legit reason. Instead, let's crack on.

So my flight itinerary changed. I get to Tulsa a couple of minutes earlier and I leave England a little later, but they moved me to Heathrow. That's annoyed my hugely seeing as Olympic traffic is going to be berserk, even 2-3 weeks before the games. I'm usually quite upbeat about such changes but I'm a little nervous about the changeover. I have just under 2 hours to get to my connecting flight. That isn't so much time to really peg it to the plane whilst checking in and stuff. Should be very fun indeed.

Maybe it's why I want to get fit. I fancy running through Atlanta!

I decided (after quite a few fat jibes) that I'd get out and get fit. Eating healthy, going to the gym and taking better care of myself. I started this on Monday officially and at a starting weight of 15st dead (95kg approx), with the aim being to reduce my body fat and get down to something like 14st by the time I leave Uni. The likeliness of this happening is not particularly high but I'm motivated more than ever to make these positive changes. Although it was adorable when Steven popped up to say that he loves me just the way I am.

True 'awwww' moment that. If you didn't gush, you have no heart!

Me and Steven have been together now for over 9 months. It seemed so far away a few months ago when we were going through a rough patch and seemed so far away when we started dating. 9 months was very much one of those special moments; however due to a living situation on his end, we couldn't spend it the way I envisaged it. When circumstances change, you realise exactly what you took for granted. I assumed I'd see Steven's face every day and I'd hear his voice when I could. I didn't fully take it for granted but I know that I didn't visibly show much I appreciated the time I got to spend with him. Now I barely get any time with him until possibly late May/early June. It's going to be a damn hard couple of weeks.

I've never doubted for a second I'd get to see him for real. Under 11 weeks. I will.

This week marks the start of the most intense period at university this year. The final term. 8 lecture weeks, 9 assignments and a hell of a time at placement to come. I thrive under a little bit of pressure but knowing that, come the end of it all, it'll be just 2 and a half weeks until I find myself flying. I got a huge confidence boost today as I got re-elected StAR Rep for my group. Knowing that people have this much faith in me to serve them is something I never got in Essex. So, I get the chance again that I never had at home. I get to shine, be independent and make people proud of me. I get the chance that I wanted but never got. And I feel as high as a kite for knowing that people believe in me!

Placement tomorrow though. I'm grounded. Temporarily. :)

91 Days To Go

13 weeks and I'm starting to feel a little queasy. Not because time is flying, but because I've just done another price search. Yes, you heard. I just wanted to see how much of a saving I have made. Compared to when it was at its peak in prices, I saved £30. Compared to where it's at now, I've lost £250. That's right, my £800 would have cost me £550 today. That is money that could have really helped in the long run (as spending money probably). Now I could face going to America STILL broke.

I gotta get seriously working soon. Like, red light district working...

I just paid out the ass for travel insurance as well. I eventually got it down from £70 to £38 using Confuzzzzled.com but it was still money that I needed to save. I'm starting to think that, after university, life with a job and a house might seem just a little easier than this. All the more impetus to keep it all going then! Being home has been a real lesson in losing independence. Whilst I have every right to do most things, I forgot just how much freedom I had away at University and just how much easier it was to relax, let go and de-stress. When I get back to Uni, whilst I'll be busy I'll be sure to have a bigger smile on my face knowing that I'm going to thrive being an underdog once again.

If you were planning a trip to Tulsa, I've saved you £282 already. Thank me in the form of a cheque please.

It's nearly 9 months me and Steven have been together. To know that I'm nearly 3/4 of the way to a year with someone is an incredible feeling. One which might not be repeated for some time. It feels incredible and it feels humbling, knowing someone wants to put up with me in such close proximity for so long too! He's got the patience of a saint he has! It got me thinking though, 9 months is a really long time. Like, January to September is 9 months and that seems an awful long time! I know we can go way longer than that, but how fast is it going to feel? These last 9 months have breezed by. What's 12/18/24 months going to feel like?

LOL. It's going to feel brilliant.

N.B. I have a pageview from Canada and I know exactly who it is. :D

96 Days To Go - ESTA

Feels weird to type only two digits in the title box. Makes this whole blog feel that tiny bit shorter. Much like my ego. It wasn't anywhere to start, then I found it and now it feels as small as the number of days left. It's been a bit of a revolutionary few days. I haven't felt totally lost without a cause, (after doing all your Easter uni work though, that feeling kinda lingers) but recently more than ever I've felt an awful amount of pressure on myself to not feel nervous or excited for what's coming up, mainly because no-one else feels that way. If you felt something completely different to everyone else, you'd be forgiven for thinking that it's wrong to feel that way. When it isn't actually. But you change it because you feel so out of place.

Until the end of Year 1 at Uni, no more excitement. I command myself to be bland and boring. Cue mild applause.

I like being home a hell of a lot. It's comforting to be in my own bed, in the security of my own house and not having to worry so much about the financial side of life. Having said that, I just bought some summer clothes. 2 pairs of jean shorts (I look like I'm wearing what 5 year olds would wear if they were freaks of nature. I look adorable), a new top and new shoes. All of this when my best friend Liam should have bought his new game. On a day where I only planned to buy a bus ticket and lunch, I ended up forking out more on clothing than health.

I'm not a stereotype by any means. But...

I also bought something else a few days ago which only became valid today, my ESTA. Essentially, you used to have to buy a Visa to enter the USA. But, because our country is popular, you can buy an ESTA from the Visa Waiver programme. It's basically a cheaper, longer lasting Visa that grants you multiple access, but the border control can still choose not to let you in. So, essentially, it's a second ticket to get it, meaning the only thing that is stopping me getting to Tulsa is the pure fact of time. And that's going to go super fast (after Easter, 5 weeks till half term, then 2 weeks after half term it's summer) that excites me. Which is why those first 5 weeks back at Uni are going to be super intense.

Watch my life crumble around me. WATCH IT....

100 Days To Go

100 days left. It's certainly looking a lot sooner now. I'm at home for about 25 of those days before I break up for summer (that's about 18 days), so I have about 50-55 days left at University. It's even scarier to them think that that means 9 assignments in about 8 weeks. Which means that this term, coupled with placement, is going to be more intense, more hard working and a lot more drinking. I kid of course. I'll only drink a little. But I'm going to have to say goodbye to weekends and goodbye to my social life (BAHAHAHA, I never had one of those!) for a couple of weeks so I don't have to worry about the prospects of resits and finding out whilst I'm in the USA.

One day, I'll be able to call these breaks from University a 'holiday'.

I didn't have the greatest run in to get to Easter. Whilst lectures wound down, assignments were, well, passed and packing went like a dream, I felt like I was battling a real sense of panic. I've said before, I'm certainly not scared of going. If I was, I would not have bought the ticket. This is the longest relationship I've been in, I've never been in one so serious and I know I'm not a massive catch so... to me, I'm pressuring myself to be as good as I can be. I want Steven and others to be able and look back, if I do anything wrong, and say that I only do what I do in life because I had the best intentions at heart. You hope that's enough to shien through whatever crack has been made.

It's going to be an unusually intense couple of days. Saturday was all about the travelling, lugging around dead weight and bar-staffing. Today is about roast lamb and Wrestlemania (:P) and tomorrow is all about removing a greenhouse and more travelling, with Tuesday being going round geeking out with Liam (much like old times!). Can't say I'm not looking forward to it, but I slept till 1:30pm today. Half my day was gone: a day I pencilled in to be my ESTA purchasing day and my journal surmising day.

Those journals will be thankful I didn't make them my bitch today. You wait till next week.