123 Days To Go

I'm back home in Essex. I admit, I was buzzing the first time because it was the first time in about 2 months that I'd seen my parents. This time, I just wanted to be home because I knew I'd be in the company of people who wouldn't throw me under the bus. I was so frustrated and annoyed yesterday, but I spoke it out with my parents and they made me feel respected. Something that I think some people don't want me to feel sometimes. When you are made to feel like a scapegoat, you find that those who accept you are those who value you for who you are and not for being a 'yes' man.

I'm so much more than a 'yes' man. I say 'no' too.

I had a really lovely 24hrs with Steven yesterday. Mainly because we are both adults and I was really made to feel like a nice adult at that by him. We talked things out and we had fun and we had a laugh. Me and him have such a good connection. I think I could talk the head off a torso, but he just lets it happen. The weirdest thing is, well, he loves it. I'm naturally very introverted but if I like someone, I come out of my comfort zone and I appear very confident. I'm not a confident person at all, but he just feels so welcoming. Which means, come July 10th, I'll be expecting the biggest hug of my life.

I'll bring the tissues. Because, after a whole year of waiting, you are bound to run and cry down that arrival gate and into the arms of the one you want to be with. Duh.

It's that time in the education system when you start to ween out who's been playing a game. Who's been a true, real friend to you. I got that feeling throughout Thursday. Me and Nicola (my Worcester best friend) had an amazing little session that night with our friend Katy and we just laughed the night away (NB - Nicking Nic's phone and texting her loverboy IS NOT THE WAY to a friend's heart or speech). It's exactly what I needed; that day was going to be a total blowover until they saved it. I can't wait for Thursday though, having a kick about with lads in our group is going to be a real highlight of my week.

76 goals in 150 appearances. I have a name to behold.