150 Days To Go

So, I only discovered this morning that my mum reads these blogs. Which is really heart-warming in one sense and scary in the other. Because these blogs are raw, from the heart. Something I've always been scared of is judgement and I always want to be judged in a good light by my parents. The fact that I have 150 days till I get to Gatwick and go to Tulsa makes it even more scary that I still worry primarily about what people think of me. Is this the concern of all teenage boys?

I panic myself easily. You don't need to prank me, I'll do it myself.

So I seem to have come down with a cold. But I never encountered anyone with a cold, so I know exactly why I got it. It happened after the pantomime I directed finished. Now I've got it after going broke and signing for a house. It's a stress related illness. I want this summer to roll around so badly that the time I'm not doing anything, I want it to end so I can be busy and kill the time till Tulsa.

I'm ill on my break but well during the work. Irony?

I'm going to see my best friend Liam at Greenwich University on Thursday. I can't wait, it makes me feel like a real Uni student. Everyone I know has had friends come up from their respective places to come visit and I get to do that soon. Hopefully he'll do the same at Easter. It actually means an awful lot to go down there and spend some time with him but it means I might sacrifice some time with my BF. I hope he understands how much it'll hurt that I won't get to sleep with him on Skype for a couple of days.

Anytime without him hurts. Lectures hurt. Work hurts. Love hurts.